


What is Owed

by Thal



Series: This Hunting Life [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angry Dean Winchester, Angst, Concerned Sam Winchester, F/M, Fluff, djinn, hurt reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:34:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26151964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thal/pseuds/Thal
Summary: Claire and the Reader take off on a hunt. Dean thinks it's just a quick, easy case, but it turns out the reader left out a few details and things go sideways....
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You, Dean/You, Dean/reader
Series: This Hunting Life [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/966201
Kudos: 7





	What is Owed

[Y/N] your name  
[Y/LN] your last name  
[Y/NN] your nickname  
[E/C] eye color  
[H/C] hair color  
[H/L] hair length/style

“You all set, [Y/NN]?” Dean Winchester asked as he rest his forearm just above his head on the doorframe to support his body as he leaned slightly into the room as [Y/N] [Y/LN], his hunter girlfriend, zipped her duffle closed. 

“Yeah, I think so. I’ll only be gone a couple days.” [Y/N] pushed an errant strand of [H/L], [H/C] hair behind her ear. 

“A couple of days too many.” Dean muttered gruffly, as he stepped forward and grabbed the strap of the duffle, slinging it over his shoulder deftly. He caught [Y/N]’s [E/C] eyes and favored her with a slow smirk. “I know you got this, I’m just gonna miss you.”

“Dean, I’m hunting with Claire, not going solo.” [Y/N] gave Dean a chaste peck on the cheek. “We’ll be fine. Claire knows her stuff.”

Dean chuckled and stepped out into the hall, [Y/N] following behind as he carried her bag to the garage to meet up with Claire.

\---------------------

It would be a few hours until they reached their destination in Kentucky and every great road trip deserved a decent playlist. [Y/N] slid the disc into the CD player and grinned as the first strains of Lady Gaga’s music met her ears.

“Dean’s still only listening to his classic rock, huh?” The younger blonde hunter laughed. Claire’s car always had a mix of music, some classic rock, of course, and some much more contemporary options. It was a relief to have more choices, one of the perks to hunting with Claire Novak.

“Same old Dean,” laughed [Y/N]. “We’ve been on several hunts together, but every time I leave him to help you, he gets all nervous. He’s such a worrier.”

“Sounds like Jody.” Claire grinned. “I’m glad you get it. We’re a good team.”

“So, I take it you didn’t tell Jody what we’re going after?” [Y/N] pulled her hair back into a ponytail as she casually glanced at Claire well aware of the fact that Jody Mills was very protective of her girls.

“Like you told Dean we’re hunting a djinn?” Claire laughed. “You wouldn’t have taken two steps out the door before he dragged you back and you know it.”

“OK, so I didn’t tell him either.” [Y/N] rolled her eyes. “He and Sam are almost always dealing with demons and angels now, and he doesn’t want me messing with that stuff. And I’m kinda in agreement with him on that, even if it sucks that he never really gives me a choice. If it lives in another world or whatever, I probably don’t really want that action. But if it lives here, with us? Yeah, that I can handle.”

“Hell, yeah! Our world, our turf!” Claire cheered. “We so got this!”

\---------------------

It had been nearly an hour since Jody arrived at the hospital and banned [Y/N] from seeing Claire after the doctors cleared her to take visitors. [Y/N] called Sam Winchester first after making sure Claire was being taken care of, having told the hospital staff that she and Claire ran across a bobcat while taking an evening hike. The Winchesters arrived at the hospital about half an hour before Jody. Dean refused to say much of anything, leaving Sam to ask for details, and it had been Sam who stood between Jody and [Y/N] when Jody blamed [Y/N] for letting Claire get hurt. [Y/N] got the distinct feeling that Dean also blamed her.

[Y/N] collapsed into the hard, plastic chair in the hospital waiting room with a groan. She dropped her head in her hands. She and Claire managed not to get bit or scratched, but both did get their share of injuries, Claire getting the worst of it with a couple broken ribs and leg. [Y/N] got away with a broken wrist and dislocated left shoulder.

“She was supposed to protect Claire. A djinn, Dean! [Y/N] is older, she should have stopped it. She should have known not to take on a damn djinn!” Jody’s voice grew louder just outside the door.

“Hey, Jody, uh, not quite so loud.” Sam’s voice came around the corner. “Look, I’m not saying they made a good choice, but this definitely isn’t only on [Y/N]’s shoulders.”

“Do not start with me, Sam Winchester!” Jody’s voice grew louder as she stepped into the waiting room, fixing a hard stare on [Y/N]. “And you stay away from Claire from now on! You’re not hunting with her anymore.”

“Jody, I’m so sorry but-“ [Y/N] slowly stood but Jody’s glare made the apology die in [Y/N]’s throat.

“Don’t talk to me, I don’t want to hear it, [Y/N].” Jody strode out of the room and turned the corned to head back to Claire’s room, followed by Dean.

[Y/N] sank back into the chair. Sam sat in the chair to her right, quietly placing a hand on her shoulder.

“I screwed up, Sam.” [Y/N] could not bring herself to look at him.

Sam sighed but did not speak, only giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

\---------------------

The rumble of the Impala’s engine was the only sound in the car as Dean drove through the night back to the bunker. For several miles no one spoke, and the tension grew torturous. Enough that [Y/N] began to replay the worst moments of the fight with the djinn in her mind. She shook her head to try to stop the images.

“Dean? I’m sorry. I know I messed up.” [Y/N] offered, trying to get him to speak to her, even if he was furious with her.

“Messed up? [Y/N], Claire could have been killed! You could have been killed.” Dean’s jaw tensed as he stared at the road ahead. “I didn’t even think it was possible for you to screw up this colossally. I thought you were smarter than that.”

[Y/N] lowered her gaze to the back of the leather bench seat before her before slowly nodding. It had been a monumentally bad call to go after the djinn with only Claire as her back up, but the mere fact that Claire wanted her help on a case was enough to get [Y/N] to easily accept taking on anything. And she thought taking down a djinn would make Dean finally relax about letting her hunt without him, but instead things were worse.

“Yeah, I’m an idiot,” sighed [Y/N]. “An idiot with no one to hunt with. I got it.”

Dean frowned and started to speak when Sam loudly cleared his throat.

“Can we maybe talk about anything else?” Sam gave his older brother a firm stare before giving a sympathetic smile to [Y/N] as he reached over to her with a bottle of water. “Here, you need to take your meds now anyway.”

[Y/N] accepted the bottle, then the two pills Sam handed her. Dean heavily exhaled through his nose and reached over to push in a Led Zeppelin cassette. Sam waited until [Y/N] swallowed her pills with some water before offering her his jacket as a makeshift blanket.

“You should try to sleep, [Y/N]. We’ve got a few hours to drive.” Sam smiled as she silently nodded and pulled the jacket over her as she reclined across the rear bench seat and closed her eyes. 

For nearly half an hour the Impala was silent aside from the music playing and the engine’s rumble as the Dean drove through the night. [Y/N] had fallen asleep from the effects of her medication, and Sam hefted a relieved sigh after he looked over his shoulder to check on her.

“She’s out.” Sam shifted in his seat to eye his brother. “Seriously, Dean? This, again?”

“She’s the one who-“ Dean started.

“Cut the crap, man.” Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “We both know it didn’t matter what she hunted or how it went, you were still gonna have this argument with her, you always do. Yeah, she got hurt, and, yeah, Claire got hurt. And, yeah, taking on a djinn in an abandoned cabin in the woods at night wasn’t a smart move. But they killed it. They got the job done, Dean.”

“Claire is in the hospital. [Y/N] knows she was supposed to have Claire’s back!” Dean gritted out, furrowing his brow. “That hunt was too risky.”

“Claire’s a hunter. She knows the risks. You know that.” Sam frowned. “Yeah, they took on a risky hunt. It was a bad call, but they dealt with it. We’ve done the same, over and over. It’s not really fair to get on [Y/N]’s case for something we do regularly. She didn’t pick the case, Claire was the one who asked her for back up. And I’m pretty sure Claire asked her because she knew [Y/N] was sick of being excluded from some of our recent cases. Yeah, [Y/N] should have said something to us, but it’s not like we made ourselves readily available either.”

“Yeah, well, you may be right about some things, but Jody’s pissed at [Y/N], so she’s pissed at us by extension.” Dean rolled his eyes. “She banned [Y/N] from hunting with Claire.”

“Jody only said those things because she was scared for Claire. You know she won’t stick to that once she’s got Claire home.” Sam shook his head. “Jody and Claire do this from time to time, sort of like you and [Y/N].”

“Yeah, maybe.” Dean shook his head. “Thought you wanted to talk about something else?”

“Dean-“ Sam scowled.

“I’m serious, Sammy.” Dean glared at the road ahead. “Just drop it.”

\---------------------

[Y/N] groaned as she rolled out of bed to be greeted by the aroma of freshly brewed coffee. It was enough to lure her out of her room and to the bunker’s kitchen. Sam Winchester was pouring coffee into one of the simple white mugs on the counter. He turned when he heard her come in and held the fresh mug of coffee out to her.

“Figured you could use some coffee before dealing with Dean today.” Sam gave her a sympathetic grin.

“Thanks, Sam.” [Y/N] accepted the mug and sat at the utilitarian table as she took a sip of the hot liquid, savoring the warmth. “Guess he’s still pretty pissed. Can’t say I blame him. I really did screw up.”

“Yeah, you really did,” agreed Sam. “What made you and Claire think you could handle a djinn?”

“Honestly? I think we both kind of needed to prove ourselves…to ourselves.” [Y/N] sighed and gazed at the coffee in her mug. “I know Jody really tries to keep Claire from taking challenging hunts when she can, and I think sometimes it makes Claire question herself. I think that’s why she wanted to take this thing down. And, yeah, that’s why she asked me to help her and not Jody or Donna. And I guess I was starting to doubt what I could handle with Dean second guessing what’s acceptable for me to hunt. I mean, yeah, angels and demons might be beyond my skill set, I won’t argue that. That demon that took out my family almost took me out, except you guys got there in time.”

“[Y/N].” Sam sighed and shook his head. “You know you took that demon out. That wasn’t Dean or me. That was you.”

“Yeah, but I doubt I’d have lived that long if you guys didn’t show up when you did. I was kinda getting my butt handed to me.” [Y/N] slumped back in the chair. “I know you and Dean try to use that night to make me feel like a badass or something, but the truth is that it just reminds me that I’m not all that great on my own. That I’m never going to be like you or Dean.”

“That’s gotta be the stupidest thing I’ve heard you say, [Y/N].” Sam scowled at her. “You were hunting before we met you and you survived without us then. And there was that time you and Dean took that break, you know, the one neither one of you actually wanted? You did fine without us then, too. You took down a rugaru on your own. You’re definitely a badass.” Sam reached across the table and gave her hand a squeeze. “Stop trying to catch up to Dean and me. We had to die more than a few times to get here. You haven’t, and we don’t want you to…ever. Got it?”

“Yeah. Got it. Promise. Pretty sure I’m benched anyway, like it or not.” [Y/N] took another sip of coffee. “So…Dean in the garage again?”

“Let’s see. You got hurt, he got angry, you slept in your old room away from him.” Sam smirked. “So, yeah, he’s in the garage.”

“Guess I need to deal with him now.” [Y/N] stood and took her mug to the sink. “To be fair, sleeping alone in my old room was more about needing space in the bed because of my injuries and less about Dean being mad at me. Although getting the silent treatment from him in bed does suck-“

“No! [Y/N], I do not want to hear about anything that goes on when that door is closed!” Sam shuddered. “Stop, please. I’m glad you and Claire are OK and you killed the djinn. Please don’t ever do that again.”

“Which one, the djinn or referencing Dean’s bedroom?” [Y/N] grinned.

“Both.” Sam gave her his sternest bitch face before chuckling. “Go bother my brother.”

\---------------------

Dean leaned over the engine block of the black 1967 Chevy Impala he lovingly called Baby as he checked the fluid levels, his black t-shirt taught across his back. His face was grim and his jaw tense as he screwed the last cap back on. He pulled back from his position under the hood and straightened.

“You looking for me, [Y/N]?” Dean questioned as he wiped his hands on a rag before lowering the Impala’s hood and turning to face her. “Or did I stop you from sneaking off on another poorly planned hunt?”

“That’s not fair-“ [Y/N] glared at Dean as he shook his head.

“Not fair was you going off knowing full well you didn’t tell me it was a djinn case because I would have stopped you from doing something so stupid. Not fair was knowingly taking on a dangerous hunt without leaving me with any way to find you if things went sideways. Not fair was letting me think it was a milk run and Claire just wanted a hunting buddy for the Hell of it. Not fair was doing something stupid and getting both of you hurt. Not fair is that Jody’s now pissed at me and Sam because of you!” Dean gritted out before stomping past [Y/N] towards the door. He stopped and turned back, his stare cold and hard and his green eyes narrowed on her. “Not only did you put yourself in danger, you put Claire in danger and she got the brunt of it. She could have been killed! Jody’s not returning my calls. You complain about not hunting with me and Sam, but then you pull shit like this. And you’re surprised I keep you off hunts?”

“Guess you’re getting what you want, then.” [Y/N] crossed her arms over her chest, her [E/C] eyes dropping the study the garage floor. “You should be happy.”

“What the Hell is that supposed to mean?” Dean’s jaw ticked as his shoulders squared.

“I’m done. May as well quit hunting since I don’t have anyone to hunt with. Now I’m not a liability to anyone.” [Y/N] turned to the door. “I’m giving you what you want. Are you happy now?”

“No!” Dean watched as [Y/N] turned back to him, surprise evident in her wide, [E/C] eyes. He lowered his voice. “This isn’t what I want.”

“You’ve been trying to keep me off hunts for weeks. Now I screw up big time and tell you I’m quitting, and you’re gonna stand there and tell me this isn’t what you want?” [Y/N]’s voice waivered and her lips disappeared into a taught line. She threw her hands up in the air with a grunt of frustration. “You’re full of it. If this isn’t what you want, then what the Hell do you want, Dean?”

“This.” Dean stepped towards [Y/N], wrapping his arms around her shoulders and guiding her into his chest as he embraced her. He rested his chin on the crown of her head as she first stiffened, then relaxed into the hug. He continued to hold her there, and, at last, [Y/N] wrapped her arms around Dean’s torso. “I want you safe, in my arms, just for a few moments. I’d prefer forever, but I’m pretty sure that’s impossible. At least, that’s what Sammy keeps saying.”

“I’m sorry, Dean.” [Y/N]’s arms gave Dean a little squeeze. “I know how much you worry because sometimes I make bad calls, maybe more than I’d like to admit. And this mess with the djinn was definitely not one of my better moments-“

“Stop it, [Y/NN].” Dean scolded lightly before dropping a kiss to the crown of her head. He pulled back just enough to gaze down at her without releasing his embrace. “Let me speak. Listen, I know we fight about this a lot, and it’s a played out argument. And I get you’re trying to do what needs to get done. But I also get that you carry some kind of guilt about what happened to your family. But it ain’t your fault. Never was. You don’t owe them anything, you killed that demon. Doesn’t matter if Sammy and I helped a little. You took care of it. Your debt, if there ever was one, has been more than paid.” Dean slowly lowered his arms, but his emerald green eyes still locked on her [E/C] ones. “You don’t have to prove anything, you don’t owe anyone anything. Not even me.”

“I can think of a few things I owe…” [Y/N] shrugged.

“You know what I mean, [Y/NN],” sighed Dean, grinning slightly. “As a hunter.”

“I guess.” [Y/N] dropped her gaze. “I’m not good enough to keep up with you guys, that’s why you’re keeping me off your hunts, isn’t it?”

“Does this have something to do with why you thought you needed to take on a djinn without talking to me or Sam?”

‘’Yeah.” [Y/N] could not bring herself to look Dean in the eyes any more. Her gaze fell to her shoes before she slowly nodded. “I’m sorry. I know I’m benched and it was in-incredibly stupid, but y-yeah.” [Y/N] swiped at her eyes with her finger tips, sniffling a bit. “I thought if we could handle it, m-maybe I wouldn’t feel so useless.”

“Hey.” Dean’s voice was softer now and he lightly took one of [Y/N]’s hands in his, his thumb gently caressing her knuckles. “You’re not useless. You should already know that, but since you don’t, I’ll tell you again. You are not useless. And you’re not benched. I mean, you might be as far as Jody and Claire are concerned, at least until Jody comes around, but as far as I’m concerned, you’re not.” Dean kissed her cheek and used his thumb to wipe away a tear. “Look, keep hunting if you want to, but do it because it makes you feel like what you’re doing is important, don’t do it because you feel obligated, or guilty, or to prove something. That thing with your family was never on you, but you owned it and you ended it. You owned it like a real badass, even if you can’t see it yourself. Just stop trying to take on more than you can handle just to prove something. Please, no more risks, OK? At least without consulting with me about how to handle it.” Dean tilted her chin up so that she would meet his gaze. He offered her a small smile. “I promise, I’ll stop keeping you out of our hunts.”

“No more risks without checking in with you, OK. I can handle that.” [Y/N] nodded although a little confused how that would work with hunting. “Wait, aren’t all hunts a little on the risky side?”

“Yeah.” Dean chuckled. “That’s kind of an oxymoron given what we do, but you know what I mean. Risks within reason are OK. And I’ll have a talk with Jody. Eventually. It may take a couple weeks before she’ll talk to us, but she’ll come around.”

The sound of someone clearing their throat at the door caused Dean and [Y/N] to turn to find Sam walking in, his cell phone to his ear as he approached them. “Yeah, I found her. She was just talking to Dean. Hold on.” Sam held the phone out to [Y/N]. “It’s Jody. She was worried you wouldn’t take her call, so she called me.”

“Thanks, Sam.” [Y/N] raised an eyebrow at Dean, but his curt nod was enough for her to raise the phone to her ear as she stepped out of the garage and into the hall to take the call, leaving Sam and Dean to their own devices in the garage. “Hi Jody. Look, about the other day, I am really sorry. I realize that hunt was a massive mistake and I should have tried to talk Claire out of it or literally anything other than what we did. I am so sorry she got hurt. You’re right, it was my job to keep her safe, and I let you both down. And-“

“Woah, are you going to let me talk? I’m the one who caller you, [Y/N]. Remember?” Jody laughed into the phone. “And, since we’ve apparently jumped right to it, apology accepted. I’m sorry, too. I didn’t mean a lot of what I said. Some of it, yes, it still stands. You both were a couple of dumbasses. But Claire shoulders a lot more of the blame than you, and I’m sorry I put it all on you last night. She also told me you’re the reason she’s still here. So, thank you. And that, uh, life-time ban on hunting, that’s clearly been lifted…once Claire has healed up.” Jody paused. “If you’re up for it, I think I owe you a dinner. Maybe a girls’ night. Gotta keep Claire amused while she’s under orders to rest.”

“Yeah, I’d like that. I’ll bring the wine, ‘cuz I kinda owe you something after we gave you that scare. Wine good?”

“Wine is always an appreciated apology.” Jody laughed. “Friday, 5PM. Stay the night. Patience makes great waffles. And you can be back to Dean by lunch, if he can stand to let you go for one hunt free night.”

“I’m sure he’ll be more than OK with that.” [Y/N] said with a grin as Dean came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her, as Sam walked past with a small nod.

“You talkin’ about me?” Dean rested his chin on her shoulder.

“Yeah, Jody invited me up for a girls’ night on Friday.” [Y/N] explained, covering the mouth piece with her hand. “With her personal guarantee it will be hunt free.”

“Can’t argue with that kind of guarantee.” He kissed her cheek. “Sounds like a fun night for you. I’m glad.”

“Dean just gave his seal of approval.” [Y/N] laughed into the phone. “I better let you go so I can give Sam his phone back. Text me if you want me to bring anything else. Looking forward to seeing you Friday! See you then.”

“See you Friday,” replied Jody before ending the call.

“I’ll get this back to Sammy.” Dean plucked the phone from her hand and slipped it in to his back pocket. He wrapped his arms back around her. “Before I do that, I got something I gotta say first.” [Y/N] turned to face Dean, his embrace loosening until she faced him and tightening momentarily to pull her into his chest. “Look, I know we keep havin’ this argument over and over. And, if I’m being’ honest, it’s probably not gonna be the last time. You keep giving me scares like this. I can’t help it.” Dean shrugged and let his hands slip to [Y/N]’s shoulders. “I never want to lose you, sweetheart. When I see you hurt, when you put yourself in danger…it’s hard to find myself on the sidelines and not able to protect you. I get scared I’m gonna lose you. Every time.” He caressed [Y/N]’s [H/L], [H/C] hair. “I’m sorry I let it get to me and that I get mad at you. This is how I vent, I guess. I’m sorry. It sucks. For both of us. But you are my everything. I need you to know that.” Dean gazed in to [Y/N]’s [E/C] eyes. “You will always be my everything.”

“And you are my everything, Dean. Always.” [Y/N] pressed her lips to his, and Dean deepened the kiss, his hand holding the back of her head before sliding to her lower back. A moment later he broke the kiss.

“I just need you to know, I don’t care how many times we have this fight, I promise, [Y/NN], it will never make me leave you. Baby, you are my everything.” Dean pulled her close. “I love you, [Y/N] [Y/LN]. And I’m in it for the long haul.”

“I love you, Dean Winchester. No matter how many arguments we have. I’m always going to be here for you. As long as there’s air in my lungs. That’s a promise.” [Y/N] hugged Dean tighter. “I won’t leave you just ‘cuz we keep having the same argument. I won’t leave you over any argument. You're stuck with me.”

“I’m stuck with you? Not if you're stuck with me first!” Dean grinned triumphantly.

“Ugh, seriously? You’re both children.” Sam rolled his eyes. “Just give me my phone and I’ll make myself scarce.”

“Sorry, man.” Dean pulled the cell phone from his pocket and lobbed it to his brother. “But, I think [Y/NN] and I will make ourselves scarce for the day.” Dean pressed his lips to her temple. “Feels like I kinda need her company after yesterday. Just a little down time. No hunting business for a solid day. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.” [Y/N] leaned into his side with a grin. “Tell you what, Sam. We’ll pick up dinner on the way back, and we’ll stop at that vegetarian place you like. You know, the one over by that bacon cheese burger joint Dean loves? That way both my guys will be happy…with dinner. Dean’s got other reasons he’ll be happy tonight.”

Sam groaned and rushed down the hall with his phone, shaking his head. Dean laughed at his younger brother’s retreat.

“I love it when you torture Sammy like that. It’s one of the many ways I know you’re the one for me!” Dean grinned. “I’m looking forward to my reasons to be happy tonight, don’t get me wrong. And those glorious bacon cheese burgers. But watching you make Sam squirm is definitely in the day’s top ten!” Dean wrapped his arm around [Y/N]’s shoulders. “C’mon, [Y/N], you, me, and Baby, and the open road. What do you say?”

“Let’s do this!” [Y/N] cheered, pumping her fist in the air.

**Author's Note:**

> I only have one planed chapter left for This Hunting Life and the The Family First arc. They are very similar, but as the Family First arc involves a child character and thus so with it's final chapter, I decided I will write a second version for This Hunting Life without that character as some of my readers are not into the whole 'Dean around children' trope, and I didn't want them not to get that special story (which is so not as much of a surprise as I act like it is, lol. I know you can see it coming a mile away.) And while that chapter is the end of Family First because it's getting it's own off shoot series that will follow the timeline for the end of the show, (like I probably should have done with Family First but I kept waffling on it...), it won't be the end of the This Hunting Life series. This Hunting Life was always intended to be open ended because I never intended to kill anyone off in this series, thus leaving me free to keep exploring this world in a linear fashion if/when I'm ready. Why the one shots? Because I really like playing with the 'friends to lovers' type of tropes, so I came up with a few new ones...sorry, not sorry. There's also an angstier themed trope I'm playing with that wouldn't mesh with This Hunting Life, so it's better as a one shot. I suck at abandoning an idea once I add it to the story notebook, lol.  
> OK, this rambled more than usual...time to go...low blood sugar means I need to eat. Oops.


End file.
